While I’m not working now and waiting for the next 2.5 years for my husband to retire as well, I’m using this time to learn and play golf and continue with my French studies to occupy my time. I’m also reading a lot and improving my knitting and crochet skills (self-taught).

Over the weekend I trialled an Over 50s group catered for women over 50. It’s event based and more social and packed with different entertaining events over Melbourne. I attended their big event where they put on a Spanish show with a flamenco guitarist and dancer. I enjoyed the show and had an opportunity to meet the other ladies and to hear their stories. (The music wasn’t new to me as I have a father who listened to flamenco music, danced flamenco and even played flamenco songs on the guitar. It just reminded me of my childhood 🤣….the irony is that I’m now obsessed but with all things French).

I think the Over 50s community is a great concept to connect women in their 50s and 60s many of whom may have had a change of lives. For example I heard many stories about divorces after many years of marriage, returning to work, finding their identity again, navigating new relationships, and dealing with their adult children and grand children.

At times I felt the odd one out who mentioned that I didn’t have either – children nor grandchildren. However this is not surprising as I guess we all come from different places with our lot in life.

It made me reflect about what I like to do with my time and how I prefer to socialise.

Many women were well travelled but also had been out to many bars, restaurants, cafes and knew these by name. When conversation turned to what to do in and around Melbourne, I realised I was clueless to these culinary experiences and could only share those experiences which stand out for me – and those happened to be around places of history, culture or art.

For example, I mentioned that I wanted to see the wonderful home estate of writer Joanne Lindsay, author of Picnic at Hanging Rock and wife to one of Australia’s artists, Daryl Lindsay who bought this place before the Great Depression and hosted many great guests of Melbourne history.

It also made me realise that I do enjoy going out and meeting people but for now, as many events are across town or in the evening at bars and restaurants, or in the day but are a little over my budget, I thought it might not be the right time for me now. I’m scrutinising where every cent is going and if I was going to spend it on something, I’d prefer to be learning something like a skill and going through as a cohort/team/class so I get to know the people deeper through it.

So one of my lessons here was the importance of my social life being with people I connect with around a deeper level and even better, around a joint skill building activity over a period of time as opposed to a group of strangers around an event for one night.

Of course, over time, those people would not be strangers and you’ll get to meet and mingle and find others with similar interests and thinking. For now, I decided not to join this group and instead enrol into a 10 week French Conversation class nearby. This is on top of my usual U3A, chats with my friend Renee every week and my classes with Nathalie every Thursday.

I would like to get out a bit more socially with others in particularly with Andrew but I figure I could organise these myself and then invite my friends to come along. Or simply to go by myself which I have absolutely no concern about (for day events. I never go out at night in Melbourne by myself as I never feel safe).

It’s good to be in this position of choices.

My next big decision point is thinking about a writing course.

I’ve researched some and I’ve found the one that I like but I might hold off to next year. Thing is that writing means I’m sitting down in front of a screen and at this moment, it’s the LAST thing I want more of. 🤣

So my new French class begins today. Let’s see how that goes.