There are days where I just feel like shit. Utter shit.

Today’s one of them.

I didn’t go for my walk or run this morning so maybe my routine was out of ‘whack’ because it didn’t start so well?

The day was gloriously sunny and despite going for a mid-morning walk in the park and then also sitting outside in my backyard for an hour, the sunlight failed to lift my mood. I took a 30 minute siesta in the afternoon and that too, failed.

The dishes were piled up in the sink and I forced myself to rinse them and place them in the dishwasher. I also baked an entire tray of Greek cheese pasties – and ate the entire lot. That’s 15 of them. I have never, in my life eaten so many and then washed them down with two cups of coffee and two Tim Tams.

Despite learning French, Morse code, reading books and writing in this blog, I feel as if I’m just plodding along. Going through the motions. I’m pushing myself to stay awake today and wait for the day to go to night to do it all over again tomorrow.

On days like this, I keep thinking, tomorrow will be another chance for me to start afresh. It will be different.

I should have just stayed in bed.

“Hang in there Helen,” I keep telling myself over and over. “This too shall pass.”

Being in lockdown has affected our psyche. You’re going to have good days and you’re going to have bad days. Your life is ‘on pause’. I think the trick is to just do what you can in the day to fill the hours with something positive and also to speak to good friends and family when you can.